I'm not lying, I spent an entire day to be emotional
It sounds so crazy when I type it out, but that's what I did. I literally picked a day that my son and husband would be gone. It was just myself and my little lady who is 7 months now. She doesn't know the difference obviously, or maybe she does. I started out the morning with looking at photos and videos of our sweet girl that I had. I pictured how she would be right now with the new baby, and how big she would be. She would be turning 6 this July, and starting first grade in the fall. I tried to think of who her teachers would be and what they would say about her. I wondered about what type of sports she would be in. She was such a girly girl, so I know she would just love the cheerleaders and Aunt Laura who coached the JV High School Cheerleaders. I would have her taking dance classes or gymnastics whichever she would love more. In the summer, she could play softball just like I did. She always loved playing baseball with Righley. I could tell she was going to be a professional at the age of 3 when she was almost hitting it as far as her older brother. I always starting things earlier with her. Everything that Righley did, I started later on in his life. I can picture her wanting to know everything about the baby while she was at school during the day and checking on her several times during the night. I know she would love to share a room with baby Ellie. I can see all the pink and flowers everywhere with books galore. I can see a closet full of clothes and toy boxes filled with toys. I can picture almost everything, but when I go to sleep I don't dream of Presley. Instead I dream of different and random things in life. Some mornings I get really frustrated that I don't dream of her. I try really hard to think of her before I go to sleep, but it still doesn't happen. After I finish all the reminiscing, and thinking of the "what ifs." I try to find sad movies that I know will destroy my heart. Those heart wrenching movies that will have me crying the whole way through, but that teach you something in life. A lot of days when I decide to do this I tend to pick movies like, Courageous, War Room or Facing the Giants. If you've never seen any of them, google them now. The Kendrick Brother's have always put out amazing movies that just seem to move you especially when you seem to be going through
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