Love is always there! People have a hard time understanding how you can grieve for a child forever. It’s hard to wrap your head around something that you can’t relate to. Most parents love their kids unconditionally, if they are here with us here on Earth or in Heaven. If they are 8 or if they are 46. Regardless of the age or where they are, we still love them. As much as I talk about what my kids did today, I will continue to talk about the things Presley did when she was here. We post our children on social media. “Oh look, Lucy peed on the potty.” “My big boy drew an elephant on his own!” We are so proud of our kids and love sharing their accomplishments, funny stories and things. One day all of those things and stories become memories that we later share. So, I share my memories of what I do have left. Some people look at grieving as such a negative thing, it’s not. Grieving is Human! We have so much love that we want to show our loved ones and when they aren’t here to receive it, the love just has no where to go. That my friends is grief. The heartache and grief is all part of growing up. Some heartaches are more painful than others, but it’s still apart of life. We learn to live and grow with it. It changes every single part of us and it continues to change us in different parts of our life. Change isn’t an awful thing. It’s okay. We always grieve for our loved ones. I lost my three year old daughter in a tragic accident. Does it define me? Nope, but it did change me. Most love harder. We see things so differently. It’s as if we were asleep before and now we are fully awake to the reality of life. As much as most of us mothers wish we lived in a bubble, we don’t. I can’t protect my children from everything, and I can’t live in a constant state of fear because of that. The life I had before my loss was a beautiful life. It was full of plans, of security and certainty. Now, it’s full of life. It’s living your life every single day. It has loss love, but also it’s loving the hardest everyday. It’s pushing away negative thoughts and replacing them with positive ones. The world is ours for the taking. So why not live it? People don’t always understand what you battle with day in and day out. Grief is not who I am. It doesn’t break me. It sets me apart from others and brings me closer to others who struggle as I do. It shows me to look at life completely different. It brought me so much closer to God The life that we live doesn’t need to be over when we experience loss, it needs to open our eyes to life. Don’t bring others down just because you are miserable. It’s okay to be unhappy and depressed. Just don’t stay there. I miss my daughter every day. I also love for my daughter every day. It hurts, just as it’s supposed to, but I keep going. For her. My question is, do you love your children? If the answer is yes, than how come I can’t love my child as if she is still here with me? Don’t let grief and not being happy define you. It doesn’t define me, but it also doesn’t mean I don’t miss Presley every second of every day. There’s more out there. There’s a life waiting for you to live.
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