Another Ray Of Light I never thought I would have any more kids. I had a boy and a girl both, and I didn't think I needed anymore. When I lost Presley, my whole entire world came crashing down. She was my snuggly bear, I love you mores, and mommy's baby! She knew she was the Princess to everyone's little worlds. Righley adored her more than she ever knew, and I think more than he even ever knew. She was my mini-me, and I'm saying she was the spitting image of me. Every step of her life, she looked like me in every aspect. The day of her funeral, I just knew I had to try again for another baby. I knew that no one would ever fill Presley's place in our life, but that I had to pick myself up in some way to be able to live life again. I found out around Thanksgiving that I was expecting a baby. I went in to the doctor close to Christmas again, because of health issues and they wanted to do a ultrasound to check on the baby which of course the baby was perfect. She asked me if I wanted to know what it was even though no one was with me, and I immediately said yes. I've never been a patient person. She had told me that it was a girl, and I instantly started to cry. I just knew that Presley had something to do with this. She hand-picked her little sister! We all welcomed little Ellie Grace into the world on June 19th, and she was perfect. She had the nose that Presley and Righley both had, her hair was dark, and she had little stubby feet (just like Grandma Girten). She was just a super calm baby, and still seems to be a year and half later. When she was a baby she would just laid there looking at every little part of my face. It was like she was studying my features. The whole time all I could think about was how much Presley would love this. If anyone would love being a big sister, it would be Presley. She would be over the moon in love with Ellie. A little after she was born and after a full day at the hospital, Righley was excited, but not as excited as I had hoped he would be. I think he was more overwhelmed. The age differences between the two are 10 years almost. That’s huge! The older she gets though, the more he’s involved. He loves seeing her hit milestones and achieve new things. He loves to make her laugh, especially when she starts laughing really hard. His mornings are filled with getting ready for school and talking to her on the way to school. He really enjoys when he gets reactions out of her while talking to her. He just says, “she really lpves me.” He just doesn’t realize how much she does really love her big brother. She’s like Presley in that aspect, she thinks he hung the moon every day. I can tell when we get home, how she looks for him or waits for him to say something, so she knows he’s there. I love seeing the interaction that he has with her. He’s so amazed at the new things she learns every day. I love that he loves that! She’s a Mommy’s girl through and through. She looks for me in every room. If she hears my voice, she is searching for me. She looks around who ever has her to find me. She always knows that I’m not far from her. I can’t help but to check on her every moment I get. When it’s time for me to cook supper, our new routine is to turn on music in the kitchen with the Echo Dot and she loves that. Music and Dancing are two of her favorite things. She especially loves Taylor Swift’s, “Shake it off.” She isn’t the only one. Presley and Righley used to dance to that song until they couldn’t dance anymore.She is the bright light that I needed in a dark time. I still have a lot of days, and even weeks when I can’t face the real life outside of our bubble, but I manage to get through. Presley would want all of us to be happy, even though living without her is such a struggle daily. I know she would love this life with Ellie here. She would always probably have to have Ellie . It wouldn’t be Mommy’s girl, it would be Presley’s Girl and I would be perfectly okay with that. Righley is Momma’s Boy, Ellie is Mommy’s Girl, and Presley will always be Mommy’s Baby. Thank you, Presley for hand picking your sister for us. She is perfectly perfect.I love you way, way more.
Kommentare